My weekend at home

It was a long weekend, so this is going to be a long post – just wanted to warn you in advance!

I left for home at about 1:00 on Friday, and after stopping to eat some lunch I was on my way home. It’s about a five-hour trip to my parents’ house with one quick stop for gas, potty and snacks. Dad called me at about 6:00 to find out where I was and to see if he should start the coals for the barbeque. I was about twenty minutes away and told him if he started the coals they would be ready by the time I got there. I arrived to find my parents and my Aunt L (my mom’s older sister) and Uncle M sitting on the front porch enjoying the beautiful weather.

Aunt L and Uncle M live in Guam, or I guess I should say they live on Guam. M was career Air Force and was stationed there for a couple of years. After he retired from the service, he and L decided they missed the island so much they moved back and have lived there for (I’m guessing) about eight years. They were supposed to come back to visit for the first time in four years later this summer but they were forced to come back sooner than anticipated due to the death of M’s father two weeks ago. Aunt L was always the fun aunt. When my cousins, my brother and I were growing up she would always get on the floor and wrestle with us. She loves kids and is a school librarian, but has none of her own (she did have a child, my cousin E.J., from her first marriage but the baby was born with medical problems and died four days after she was born). I can remember meeting M for the first time when I was about seven and thinking he was just as much fun as she was. Out of the three sisters Aunt L reminds me the most of my grandma, who passed away when I was almost nine.

We had cheeseburgers on the grill, which I was a little afraid to eat after having a cheeseburger the night before that sent me to the emergency room, but I’m glad I ate it because it was GOOD! Our neighbor R stopped by to pick up one of my dad’s dogs, Jr. Dad had decided to give the dog to R because R wanted a bird dog and Dad knew that he would provide Jr with a good home. After talking a bit and drinking a few Busch Lights (about the only thing my parents will drink), R and Jr left and we went four-wheeling. Mom and Dad had agreed to keep an eye on a couple of four-wheelers owned by neighbors who were on their honeymoon as there had recently been a rash of four-wheeler thefts in the area, so I took one and L and M took the other while we were lead by Mom and Dad on theirs. We drove around the farm to places I hadn’t seen in years on paths created by my parents. A couple of the paths went through mud holes and while I ended up getting pretty muddy I didn’t get stuck. We had a great time but were forced to head back to the house once the sun set. L and M left (they were staying at my grandparents’ house) and we went to bed.

One of my favorite things about staying with my parents is our morning coffee on the front porch. You wake up, make yourself a cup of coffee, go outside, sit down, and just take in the fresh air, the green of the yard and fields and, if you’re lucky, watch the wildlife eat their breakfast. Some of our best conversations occur on the front porch. Eventually though you have to get on with your day, so we ate some leftover burgers for lunch and began preparing for H’s wedding at 4:00. We left about 3:00 so we could stop by the cemetery to put some flowers on my grandpa’s grave (Mom and Dad had already made the trip to M-ville to put flowers on Grandma’s grave and the graves of my great-grandparents). They had just laid the headstone about a month before so this was my first time seeing it. There were already so many flowers there and a “Happy Birthday” balloon as Grandpa’s birthday was on May 24 and my grandparents’ wedding anniversary was on the 26th (it’s been a rough week for the family).

H and M’s wedding was in S at the Methodist Church. Not only are H and I cousins (H is Aunt M’s youngest son) but we were also in the same class in school. (I also had my twin cousins on my dad’s side in my class and, needless to say, with three male cousins in my class out of 38 total students, I didn’t date much.) We arrived and the first person I saw in a tux was J. J, another classmate who is now living in Iowa, was prom king to my prom queen. I hadn’t seen him in years and it was good to catch up with him for a bit. We headed into the church and my grandpa and step-grandma (who has been my grandma longer than my biological grandma was) were already seated. The mood of the wedding was very casual, so I went up and talked with them for a bit. The wedding was nice considering the VERY limited budget they had to spend. Their son, C, who was born in December, was ring bearer and was carried in by M’s sister. My oldest cousin, M, was best man and his wife, H, was matron of honor. H is eight months pregnant, and I don’t think there was a part of her body that wasn’t swollen – she looked miserable, poor girl. We had cake and punch afterwards and I caught up with my other cousin, L. L’s oldest daughter has turned into a holy terror and kept calling me “fat lady” the whole time (that was pleasant). We helped to clean up after the reception and went home to change clothes with a stop in M to pick up a pizza for dinner.

The wedding dance was at 8:00 and took place at H and M’s house on a farm outside of M. They moved the combines and tractors to the back of the machine shed and set up a DJ and a keg of Natural Light inside. The weather was turning nasty and there had already been reports of tornadoes and hail south of StJ, so we were keeping an eye to the sky. Uncle M, after living in Guam for so long, forgot that the weather moved from the west to the east in the states (apparently it moves in from the east there). The rain began about 9:30 and we moved the picnic tables and chairs into the shed. There were others from my high school class at the reception as well, including my old friend A. A was one of my best friends in high school, and we had known each other all of our lives. One of the first things someone said to me when I mentioned she was there was, “You know she swings both ways, don’t you?” I didn’t know, but it was really no surprise to me. She has always been very affectionate, and when she saw me she came up and gave me a big hug and kiss, which I’m totally fine with a peck on the lips from a friend. However, she ended up hanging on me half of the night. At one point she bared her drunken soul to me and told me that she thought she had developed ADD from all of the speed and meth she had done, but she assured me that was behind her and now she only smoked weed. I knew about the drugs, and in fact A’s brother and I had a conversation once about how concerned he was about her drug habit and how it’s affecting her two boys. After the tears and the “I love you, man” she gave me yet another big hug and a kiss, but I swear this time she tried to put some tongue in it. Well, I don’t swing that way and, needless to say, I avoided her the rest of the night and planted myself next to a girl I used to baby-sit who was finishing up college and getting married in October. I was ready to leave, found H and gave him my congrats and a big hug and told him I was going to leave before A found me and gave me a big kiss. H said, “I don’t blame you there,” and I drove home.

I woke up Sunday at 10:30 with little time to get ready for the fish fry we were having for my dad’s side at Grandma’s house. All of my dad’s siblings (three sisters, one brother) and many of my cousins and their families were there as we all knew what a rough week it had been for my grandma. I saw two of my newest little cousins (my cousins’ kids) for the first time. After an excellent dinner the kids played outside and I got to talking with my cousin T, who’s probably closest to me of all of my cousins, and her sister-in-law B, about craft projects. T thanked me for the birthday card I sent her. Her birthday was on the 23rd and she always shared her birthday with Grandpa since they were only a day apart, so I knew it would be a hard one for her. We got to talking about genealogy, which inevitably happens with us, and discussing whether or not we were related to the Presidents John and John Quincy Adams (we have some Adamses in our family). I was convinced we were not related because while we could document our family to a John Adams who fought in the Revolutionary War, he was not the president. However, T said that our cousin J (who was not there) had received from a friend some documents from Washington, DC, proving we were in fact related to the presidents. So Grandma started digging through her papers to find the proof, which we never found. Instead she shared with us some old photos of her mother and father. Once we were through looking at the pictures, we went outside to watch the kids play. My dad had brought a bow and some arrows and was showing some of the older kids how to shoot. We talked some more and around 5:30 we left for home. Who should we find upon our arrival but Jr, the dog Dad had given to our neighbor, R. Apparently Jr had gotten loose and found his way back to our place and was playing with our other dog, III. They love running the farm looking for birds and were having a good ole time. We pinned Jr up and called R to let him know we had his dog.

My parents are dedicated archers. They both shoot archery all year long and travel to tournaments all over the country (which is part of the reason I hadn’t been able to get home to see them since tax season ended). They shoot both indoor and outdoor archery and have trophies throughout the house as they are pretty good. In fact, they are both past national champions and usually place in major tournaments. They wanted to get in some practice so I checked my e-mail while they went outside to shoot. I later went outside to join them, but the weather looked like it was going to turn bad again. We decided to just watch some movies for the rest of the evening and ate some salami and cheese for supper.

Monday was pretty low-key. I woke up, had my coffee on the front porch, and Mom asked me what I wanted her to make - brunch or deer steak. I told her I could have brunch back in St. Louis but couldn’t have her deer steak. So Mom proceeded to slave away in the kitchen (with my occasional help) making my favorite meal in the whole wide world – country fried deer steak, mashed potatoes with country gravy and home-grown sweet corn. Maybe I’m a bit partial, but no one can make it like Mom can. I ate until I couldn’t eat any more then I helped Mom with the dishes while Dad took his usual post-meal nap. I wanted to go four-wheeling again so I could get some pictures of the farm, so Mom and I each grabbed one and we went. Now that I’ve been away from home for 12 years I really appreciate the beauty of the land and of home. Mom and I went to the highest hill with the best view on the farm. We drove back to the house just as R was pulling up to get Jr (we’ll see how long it takes before Jr gets loose again). After R left I packed up and headed back to St. Louis.

So, that was my weekend. It’s always great to get back home and see my family, but when I see my friends from high school who stayed, I remember why I left. I had told Aunt L earlier that I always knew that staying on the farm wasn’t for me and I’m glad I left. It’s just kind of hard when you miss your family so much to leave again, but I know that I wouldn’t be happy there. I’ll post pictures as soon as I get them loaded onto my computer.